Christmas Contrasts: Change, Loss, and Love

Each year, I meet friends who have lost loved ones–parents, siblings, children, spouses, and best friends. What is the most wonderful time of the year for many, is the hardest for others. There have been several posts on Facebook related to grief during the holiday season. Some relate to what grievers wish others knew or would do. Some relate to loss experienced when a change occurs and a woman faces Christmas as a single Mom.

Just this morning while wrapping presents, I thought of someone sitting by a hospital bed, and two texts arrived asking for prayer for others in life altering health issues. Several years ago, out of my own grief, I wrote a piece for Penned from the Heart. Christmas Contrasts. It applies not only to grief as we think of it, but life altering change we didn’t welcome.

CHRISTMAS CONTRASTS

Christmas–we sing carols, gather with family and friends for celebration, exchange gifts, and send cards giving our latest news. Yet, in our festivities, we may forget that…

     While someone is laughing, someone is grieving.

     While someone is busy planning, someone feels numb and lonely.

     While someone sets a table for many, someone sets a table minus one.

     While someone celebrates, someone is hurting.

     While someone decorates with tinsel and lights, someone else’s sparkle has been diminished.

     While someone opens gifts, someone knows one of their most precious gifts is gone.

     While someone writes a card or letter, someone has signed it with one less signature,

While someone looks forward to new experiences, someone see them as a future loss.

While someone is shopping, someone is maintaining a hospital vigil.

Circumstances such as death of a loved one are irreversible, but could you be an instrument to offer strength and comfort to a grieving person–or someone facing a serious illness, by letting them know you remember? A call, visit, or card can be a comfort. And, when you don’t know how to specifically pray, consider filling in that person’s name in the apostle Paul’s prayer and pray for them today.

 “I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3:16-19 (NIV)

    The Conversation

  1. Amen to all of the above, Marilyn. Your contrasts are poignant and bring to mind several of my own friends and family members in those kinds of situations.
    As you suggested, we need to remember hurting people in meaningful ways.
    Your concluding prayer is perfect.

    • Marilyn Nutter says:

      Thanks Connie. There have been many FB links to articles on grief in the past few day. Many discuss how grief is hidden from others. We never know what someone is going through this season so we can all be kind. But when we do know, I hope we can do more and minister in practical ways besides prayer. Marilyn

  2. I’m so sorry you went through the loss you did, Marilyn. But God has given you a compassionate heart and you are able to reach out and think of those who are hurting in the same way. After just going through watching my husband experience heart surgery, I am so thankful that he is still here with me. It does make us more sensitive to the pain other people may be feeling and at holiday time it is more pronounced. Thank you for sharing from your heart.

  3. Thank you for the reminder, Marilyn, that not everything is “merry and bright” for many people during the holidays. May God bless you this season with sweet memories and the joy of family surrounding you!

  4. Candyce Deal says:

    This is a beautiful reminder of what some are facing this Christmas. I know several families who have buried a loved one this month. Let us not forget them in their pain.

  5. I think we sometimes forget that Christmas isn’t Merry for everyone. Your words have reminded me to seek those who are hurting and attempt to offer peace and comfort. It is the season of love and there are many ways to share our love with others. Thank you for your inspiring message.

  6. Lori Hatcher says:

    I love this, Marilyn. Hard truth, but truth. Even smiling faces hide weeping hearts. Because of your reminder, I’m going to ask the Lord to remind me of those who have suffered recent losses and reach out to them this week. Merry Christmas, friend!

  7. Jeannie Waters says:

    Your contrasts remind us to open our hearts and minds to those around us. Thank you, Marilyn, for using your grief to help others.

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